Life Is Changing and I've got the Itch.

For me, with change in my life, comes change with my hair. I'm not sure if it is a coping mechanism or a form of self expression, but I'm very much a person who expresses what I'm feeling emotionally through my hair. Looking back at pictures of myself over the years, this can be seen greatly. From the time in high school where I was feeling rebellious, went to a cheap salon and had the beautician cut off all of my hair, to the beginning of my freshman year of college when the freedom I felt at being away from home sent me into a hair dying frenzy. I went from jet black to auburn (or as my dad called it when I came home one weekend and shocked my parents, "big red") then blonde, and finally, superman blue-black -- which resulted in a weird shade of green that I wholly embraced!

The change came again when I left university for technical college, and decided to go natural. Then again when I was going through some heavy emotional things and chopped off my hair on my own (horrible experience.) The pattern here is that when I'm feeling a change in myself or environment, I do something drastic to my hair.

So lately I've gotten the itch again and I want to preform a random act of expression on my hair. I think this has to do with my oldest daughter starting school. Maybe it's the difference I feel around the house with her not being here during the day that has me wanting to take a pair of clippers to the side of my head, I'm not completely sure. Nevertheless, I do want to give myself a funky, new style. Namely, I want to have Hubby fade a section of my hair on the left side of my head. Though I've experimented with my hair, I've never gone the asymmetrical route, but I'm thinking I might.

Life is changing and I think my hair will change with it...

(example of how I want my side to look)

Rockin' My Fro

Yesterday I channeled Pam Grier's Foxy Brown and wore my hair out, big and free. I loved it!! There is something about having big natural hair that makes me feel like I'm on a whole nother level of cool. But more than that, there is something about rocking a large and in charge fro that gives me the feeling of realness that I don't get when my hair is styled in other ways.

My afro got me thinking about pictures of my mother with her hair picked out and the stories she told me about wanting to have a big fro, but her hair lacking the texture needed to really rock one. She and her sisters would tightly roll their hair up at night and pick it out in the morning to achieve the look that all of the down black people were wearing back then, you know, in the late sixties and seventies.

I couldn't help but wonder what happened to that natural mentality that so many black people had back then. What happened to being as black as you could be from head to toe? Why is it that the very same people who wore huge Afro's back in the day, don't any more? When did women stop with the big, bountiful fro's and begin straightening their hair again and why?

I'll have to call my mother up and chat with her about this, but I thought I would share it here first to get your take. Do you believe that the embracing of natural hair was a phase to a lot of the people involved, a way to be cool, something to do? Had it to do with cultural expression after years of conforming? Or was it something else? What are your thoughts?

Bag O' Hair & Finding My Footing

I've already posted about cutting my hair off after growing it out naturally for 3 1/2 years. Now I thought I would show you just how much hair was left after my latest damage induced BC.


Click on pics to enlarge.
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On another note, I'm trying to come up with a good name for this blog. Seems like most of the names I've come up with so far are already in use. Great minds and all that jazz, I guess. I think I've come up with a name now that won't need to be changed, but if the need arises, please bear with me. The site address will remain the same, so no worries there.

Little Girls and Relaxers

(My youngest daughter, Jerney)
My earliest memories of getting my hair styled include me in the kitchen next to the stove, wincing as my mother sizzles through my hair with the hot comb. Yep, I'm from the old school, back when electric flat irons weren't even an option. Since I hated having my hair flat ironed and made it more of a chore than a quick and easy styling session for my mother, she went ahead and relaxed my hair--because that's what most black women did to their daughter's hair back then.

Of course, I had no notion of the dangers in having my hair relaxed, and it wasn't until I was in fifth grade, seeing a peer walk the hallways with her head down after having her edges burned away from a perm application, that I realized the very thing that straightened my hair and made it "pretty" could also really hurt me. In my childs mind I remember thinking myself lucky that my mom had never done that to me. Little did I know that even though my scars weren't visible, they were still there. My natural hair had been altered, the root, the shaft, the cuticle, everything was scarred.

When I turned 21 and entered cosmetology school, I began to learn about caring for natural hair and all of the negative things that chemicals do, not only to your hair, but to your scalp as well. I decided right away that I was stopping with the relaxers and that I would NEVER relax my daughter's hair. It just wasn't an option.

Lately, I've been in contact with mother's who are eager for their child to turn a certain age so that they can get their hair relaxed. I've heard many reason's for this, from manageability, to time consumption. I'm the type of person who wants to yell "Don't do it. Reconsider, read some liter-ature." But since it is not my child, I say instead, "Really?" and them try to give the mother some other options. Sometimes it is hard for me to bite my tongue, but more than anything I don't want to push my opinions on anyone else, especially when it comes to their child. I, myself, am fairly new to this and I'm still learning. Many women of color, have not the slightest clue of the fall backs of relaxers, or how to deal with natural hair. Not very long ago, I was just as uneducated in natural hair as well.

If I had a magic wand, I would wave it and make it so that all women with little girls who were considering relaxing their hair would know how to take care of the beautiful natural hair that their child has. But that's not possible, so instead I sit here typing my thoughts on it and hoping that at least one mother facing this situation comes across my little post and maybe changes her mind.

Product Spotlight: Herbal Essences

After chopping off a good amount of my hair to get rid of heat and chemical damage, my remaining hair was a little dry and in serious need of moisture. I have been using coconut oil and it works well, but is a little heavy and weighs my hair down. I needed something that I could wash out and still retain moisture. After reading about Herbal Essences Hydralicious and Totally Twisted line on a few blogs, I decided to try it.

Last night I washed with HE Hydralicious Reconditioning Shampoo, and conditioned with HE Totally Twisted Curls and Waves. Hydralicious is a thick, creamy blend with a mild, somewhat bubblegum scent. After rinsing, I followed up with Totally Twisted conditioner, which also has a light bubblegum scent. After rinsing that, I noticed that my curls had popped out. They were well defined, my hair was left soft and manageable. I just wanted to run my fingers through it over and over!

I continued with my normal routine of shea butter and olive oil for my two strand twists, and set my hair on small perm rods using end papers to keep my ends smooth. This morning I took the rods down and untwisted my hair then picked it out for volume.

What I noticed most: My hair is very soft and has a nice shine. My curls are well shaped. My hair is less frizzy than when using Suave Naturals. I will definitely be using HE on a regular basis and I'm going out today to get more of products from the Totally Twisted line!

(Click on pics to enlarge them)


P.S. Please ignore my bag of chips in the background. It was lunch time when I took these pics.

Naptural Inspiration

As mother to two young girls, ages 3 and almost 5, I've dedicated myself to making sure that their hair is always styled to show off its true beauty. Hair washing and styling is a part of my family's Sunday afternoon routine. They have become accustomed to this and look forward to it with excitement. My girls love to look in the mirror after I'm done with their hair and ooh and ah over their neat tresses. They love it when their father compliments them on their hair. I taught them early on that their hair is gorgeous, and that their beautifully curly hair is something to be proud of.

In Hawaii there are many young girls of Asian, Polynesian, Hawaiian, and Samoan ethnicity's and most of those little girls have straight hair. I never wanted my girls to feel as though their natural coils were something that made them different. Instead I wanted them to see their hair as I see it, beautiful! I want them to embrace their culture and represent it in this place where they are very much the minority.

This is why this story I read on Black Girl With Long Hair touched me so. Clifton Green is a professor at Emory University. He is Caucasian and his daughter, Miriam, is Ethiopian. In order to make sure that Miriam always feels her best in her appearance, Clifton took it upon himself to learn how to care for her "curly, coily, bouncy" hair. It is not very often that father's in general take the time to learn how to style and treat their daughter's hair, so that alone is a big plus for me. And his dedication to making sure that Miriam's hair is always at it's best is very heart warming. Read his interview here.

P.S. Just thinking about fathers doing their little girls' hair took me back to the times when my own father would attempt to do mine. Can you say ouch!?

Product Spotlight: AMBI

For the most part, I haven't had to struggle with acne. As a teen I got the normal breakouts at puberty and then a pimple here and there. Into adulthood, my skin cleared up pretty well and aside for being a little oily, I had no complaints up until a few months ago. I had stopped taking BC pills due to the severe headaches they caused me and immediately after stopping them my face began to break out, the most problematic area was my forehead. I guess that the hormones in the BC were keeping me free of breakouts and the Dove White Bar wash I normally did twice a day was no match for this new case of acne.

After trying things that worked for me as a teen and not liking the results, I remembered my dad religiously using AMBI and decided to give it a try. I ordered the Even & Clear Exfoliating Wash and the Even & Clear Daily Moisturizer with SPF 30.

The Exfoliating Wash, I use twice a day, once in the morning and then before bed. It has tiny microbeads that don't hurt, but I can feel them working. After rinsing my face, I follow up with the Daily Moisturizer, which I use very sparingly! The moisturizer is a little heavy, so for my already oily skin, a little goes a long way.

My results so far? I've been using it for a few weeks and I'm singing its praising. My skin tone is noticeably clearer, the pimples that were on my forehead have dried up and are gone. No new ones to report. My face is soft and it has a natural glow that I'm loving. I have no complaints and would definitely recommend this so someone looking for an option outside of the norm.